If you are visiting this page because you are feeling suicidal, I want to speak to you, heart to heart. I know what it is like to feel like you can't bear the pain you feel one more day. You don't really want to die...you just don't want to hurt anymore...or you just want to feel something, after feeling numb for so long. You see no way out and death seems like the easiest way to make it all stop.
I want to encourage you that even though things might seem so dark that you can't see any light around you...there is hope...I have been where you are at and I am living proof that things can get better. I know God does have a plan and a purpose for you and your life...and it's a good plan...a plan to give you a hope and a future. (Jeremiah 29:11) I am here today to help others because I made it through to the other side of some pretty hard things in life. I believe my purpose is to encourage those who are hurting and to give them hope that things can get better. I'm not saying life is always going to be easy...I'm not about sugar coating anything. Life is not easy...it can be so hard at times...life is not always fair...to be honest, most of the time, it isn't fair at all...but I do have some good news. There is someone who will stick by you through anything and everything. That person is Jesus. You may not believe in God...or maybe you've turned your back on Him because of your thoughts of suicide or because you think that He doesn't hear your prayers...but He is listening and He does care about each one of us!
My life has been kind of crazy, but Jesus has helped me through it all. Jesus is the only way I have been able to deal with things like being molested by multiple people...being in a violent relationship where someone tried to kill me... I've had to deal with infidelity and betrayal. I've had multiple miscarriages and developed health problems that have kept me bedridden for years at a time. I've faced financial difficulties where I didn't know how I was going to feed my son or pay my bills. Jesus has helped me to get through everything I've faced. He never left me alone...I would not be alive today, if not for him. He's not some fairy tale...or just someone you learn about in Sunday School. He helps give you peace, strength and comfort when you call upon his name. I have seen so many miracles in my life, I have absolutely no doubt in who He is or what He does. He answers when we call on Him for His help. The hope that we all need and seek can be found in Him.
If you think that no one cares about you, you are wrong. You do matter. You are important. Life can get better. There is hope! Most people at one time or another will deal with some form of depression. It is more common than you can imagine. To seek help is nothing to be ashamed of. It does not mean you're weak. It's no different than taking care of a physical condition like diabetes or a heart condition. We need to take care of our mental and emotional health in the same way we look after our physical and spiritual health.
Sometimes there are things that we have absolutely no control over in life, but the one thing that we ALWAYS have control over is our attitude on how we deal with things in life. What we go through in life doesn't determine our destiny....we do have a say...we choose who we listen to in life. Check out the hard trials that happened to some of the most well known people of our time...
Richardson Branson founder of Virgin Mobile, Virgin Airlines, Virgin Records dropped out of school at age 16. He was Dyslexic, had struggled in school and was told he was too stupid to ever amount to anything.
Walt Disney: was fired by a newspaper editor because he lacked imagination and had no good ideas.
Charles Schultz: who created Charlie Brown and Peanuts, had every cartoon he drew turned down by his high school paper... and Walt Disney wouldn't hire him.
Michael Jordan: was cut from his high school basketball team.
Babe Ruth: held the strike out record until he had the home run record. He struck out over 1300 times and hit 714 home runs.
Albert Einstein: was thought to be stupid...he was very slow to learn, to speak and read.
All these people had something in common. They did not listen to the negative, hurtful things that people said to them. They chose to drown out those voices with a belief that they were more than what others thought of them.
Perhaps you're not overwhelmed by people's hurtful words or opinions of you...Maybe you're dealing with violence, addictions, abuse, neglect , illness or perhaps you’re just struggling to cope with loss in your life. Perhaps you are just lonely or tired of being in physical or emotional pain. Whatever the reason you are feeling the way you are, there is hope for you. I have friends who have lived through some of the worst violence imaginable. One of my friends, Chris Keith, survived his dad killing his mom, his brother, and shooting Chris in the head, before he killed himself...there was domestic violence in his home before his dad snapped that night. Chris would tell you that he survived and he is glad he did, so that he can help others who are struggling. I know so many stories of people who have overcome so much. Most of them would tell you, that they had struggled at some point with depression and wanting to escape the pain. All of them would tell you they are glad they hung in there, because they would have missed out on healing and hope and the great things that were in store for them.
The other thing I want to say to you is, I have dealt with so many people who are left behind after their loved ones have taken their life. The pain and torment they suffer with is horrific. They are left with a life time of pain, questions, “why’s” and “what if’s”. Don’t think that suicide is something that people will understand or get over...the pain does not end for those who are left behind. You may not feel loved, but I assure you that there are people who love you and would be devastated if you weren't around. Sometimes people who take their lives think that people will be better off without them around, but nothing could be further from the truth.
Here are some resources for you and places you can call to talk to someone.
1-800 SUICIDE (24 HOUR HOTLINE)
http://www.suicidepreventionlifeline.org/ 1 (800) 273-TALK (24-hour hotline)
Befrienders Worldwide - To find a helpline in your area of the world go to www.befrienders.org - "We work worldwide to provide emotional support, and reduce suicide. We listen to people who are in distress. We don't judge them or tell them what to do - we listen."
If you are feeling suicidal here is a prayer that you can pray... there is hope... there are people who care... things will get better, just reach out and let others help you.
Lord, I come before You with a heavy heart. I feel so much and yet sometimes I feel nothing at all. I don't know where to turn, who to talk to, or how to deal with the things going on in my life. You see everything, Lord. You know everything. Yet when I seek you it is so hard to feel You here with me. Lord, help me through this. I don't see any other way to get out of this. There is no light at the end of my tunnel, yet everyone says You can show it to me. Lord, help me find that light. Let it be Your light. Give me someone to help. Let me feel You with me. Lord, let me see what You provide and see an alternative to taking my life. Let me feel Your blessings and comfort. Amen.
Here is a short video from Nathan Peterson, from the band "Hello Industry" talking about his experience with his father's suicide attempts as well as his own. Here is a link to the band's website: http://helloindustry.com/